The Apostle John writes of “fathers” as those who have grown from being “babes” and “young men.” This maturity of “fathers” is spoken of as being the result of the relationship of their knowing God — Him that is from the beginning. In distinction from this, the Apostle Paul’s references to “fathers” is presented in connection with their ability and diligence in practical oversight and care of God’s children: “Though ye have ten thousand instructors in Christ, yet have ye not many fathers: for in Christ Jesus I have begotten you through the gospel. Wherefore I beseech you, be ye followers of me” (1 Cor. 4:16). Maturity in both of these areas is important in order to be a good “father.” This role of “fathers” mentioned throughout the epistles in the New Testament is in reference to “spiritual fathers” — the mature ones who are born again and are a part of the family of God or the church of God. The Lord Jesus in the first three Gospels often referred to “your Father which is in heaven” when speaking to His disciples. This was regarding God as Father in the natural realm. It was only after the death and resurrection of the Lord Jesus that we could know God as Father in the intimacy of being children of God, as we now know Him. Knowing God as Father in the spiritual sense only came into being after the Lord rose from the dead and appeared to Mary and said, “Go to My brethren, and say unto them, I ascend unto My Father, and your Father; and to My God, and your God” (John 20:1717Jesus saith unto her, Touch me not; for I am not yet ascended to my Father: but go to my brethren, and say unto them, I ascend unto my Father, and your Father; and to my God, and your God. (John 20:17)). In taking up the subject before us, we believe it is beneficial to consider both the spiritual and the natural relationships. Our knowledge of God as Father exceeding the relationship in nature that the disciples understood should not make us discount the references the Lord made to them about “your Father” in the Gospels. They are role models for spiritual fathers too. The Lord gave them as an example of what our heavenly Father is like. As other articles in this issue take up the subject of what John and Paul say, I will limit my comments to the examples of the Father given in the Gospels.
Your Heavenly Father
When it comes to learning how to be a good father, surely there is no better way than considering the example of our heavenly Father. In Matthew 5:4848Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect. (Matthew 5:48) we are told, “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.” He is our one and only role model. We have a perfect example to follow, yet how few are those who replicate the model!
Throughout the Gospel of Matthew we have several other examples given to us of our heavenly Father. In chapter 5:45 it says, “He maketh His sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust,” indicating that He acts from Himself in blessing. His actions of blessing come from His own goodness, and not because of merit in the receiver. The Lord has given us an unlimited source of blessing to draw upon and pour out to those around us. A good “father” will do this.
Forgiveness
Forgiveness is another characteristic of the Father, which we are to extend to those who trespass against us, as seen in Matthew 6:14-1514For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: 15But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (Matthew 6:14‑15). This example of forgiving is incumbent on us to imitate, because, being saved sinners, we depend on His forgiveness to be accepted in the place of blessing before God. If we do not forgive, we are liable to come under governmental judgment from Him. Matthew 18 enlarges on this point as a similitude of the kingdom of heaven — the present dispensation in which we live.
Generous Good Gifts
The giving of good gifts is another characteristic of our heavenly Father mentioned in Matthew 7:1111If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him? (Matthew 7:11). This kind of giving would not be limited to material possessions, but includes time, energy and all things done for one’s good. It becomes fathers to be giving persons. Included in this is not only the act of giving, but knowing what things are best to be given. In Luke 11:1313If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him? (Luke 11:13) where this is recorded it says, “How much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask Him?” indicating that He gives the very best gifts to His creatures. A good father knows how to give the best gifts. Because he is generous and also knows better than the receiver what is good, the father does not simply give what the receiver wants. Maturity and experience help us know when and what to give. This is apparent in the way the father of the prodigal son gave generously. We will notice more in the application of this story later.
“Father of Spirits”
In connection with knowing what is best not to give, we have an example in Hebrew 12 where the chastening of a father is mentioned. The Lord is referred to as “the Father of spirits” (vs. 9), indicating how He perfectly understands our inner spirits and chastens or withholds from us what is not for good. A good father will do this for those in his care. It is love that motivates him to do so. A good father knows how to combine the two for good. “Ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Eph. 6:44And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4)).
Merciful
Luke the evangelist adds another characteristic of our heavenly Father which is very relevant to our subject. “Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful” (Luke 6:3636Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. (Luke 6:36)). An elderly brother who is now with the Lord commented to me that he thought we should become more mild as we age, and that something was wrong if we did not. It seems to me that this is somewhat the thought of a father being merciful. This mercy is in no way at the expense of truth, but is to be as it says in Proverbs 16:66By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the Lord men depart from evil. (Proverbs 16:6), “By mercy and truth iniquity is purged.” Our Father is an expert at finding ways to be merciful without compromising truth. “Fathers” ought to be known for their propensity to show mercy.
The Prodigal Father
This brings us to the well-known story of Luke 15 — the prodigal son, which many of us have enjoyed as a demonstration of how our Father has forgiven and received us back to Himself. As we grow in appreciation of the story, it becomes more and more a story of the Father than of the son. We see in this story all the characteristics we have mentioned: mercy, forgiveness, and the giving of good gifts, besides many others not mentioned. It is a story that reveals our heavenly Father as a role model for fathers. When we as fathers emulate this example, Christ is glorified. He did the work so that sinners could be received into such a place of privilege. Only those who despise grace will not appreciate such favor. May these few comments encourage us to be like our heavenly Father.
“Jesus saith unto them, Have ye understood all these things? They say unto Him, Yea, Lord. Then said He unto them, Therefore every scribe which is instructed unto the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man that is an householder [a father], which bringeth forth out of his treasure things new and old” (Matt. 13:51-5251Jesus saith unto them, Have ye understood all these things? They say unto him, Yea, Lord. 52Then said he unto them, Therefore every scribe which is instructed unto the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man that is an householder, which bringeth forth out of his treasure things new and old. (Matthew 13:51‑52)).
D. C. Buchanan