Wives
Let’s go back to Ephesians 5 to consider the wife. “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” This verse does not mean it is your prerogative to discern and to decide whether your husband has the Lord’s mind or not. That is not what is meant by “as unto the Lord.” It means you are to submit to your husband as you would to the Lord. He has been placed, in God’s wisdom, in God’s love and in God’s care for you, in authority over you. I wouldn’t have made it that way. Few things cause me more trembling than when I look at myself and realize that God has subjected a wife, a human being, to me. But He has.
Rebekah was asked, “Wilt thou go with this man?” Dear wives, you are saying you are going to go with that man. Your safety lies in unfeigned subjection to that man. You may not think so on the wedding day, but no doubt in your marriage there will be times when you think that your dad was a better person than your husband that dad was wise, or that dad was this or that. You are going with your husband, not your father, and he is the man that you have chosen.
It says of the woman that she may “be married to whom she will; only in the Lord” (1 Cor. 7:3939The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord. (1 Corinthians 7:39)). God gave you, sisters, the choice to marry whomsoever you would, only in the Lord. It was your decision; you made it: “I will go” with this man. Don’t try to change him; don’t try to make him over to your ideas of what a man should be. I venture to say, dear sisters (and I think it is probably true of us brothers too), that you may have little idea what a man is to be. Sometimes we men get taken up (in formative discipline) by the Lord. The making of a man of God is a very painful matter, and a woman must not try to stop that process nor to seek to take that process on herself. Unfeigned subjection, or it’s all over for us, and it’s all over for the assembly. The assembly is in ruin today because it has not submitted to Christ, its Head. He has loved us perfectly, but we have not submitted to Him.
Mothers
I’ve already called attention to the expression, “The male and [its] female.” I believe that with but one exception, the order always is, “Male and female.” That is God’s order and if it’s reversed, it is to confusion.
In Deuteronomy 14 where we have the clean and unclean animals, the order is reversed. In Deut. 14:1515And the owl, and the night hawk, and the cuckow, and the hawk after his kind, (Deuteronomy 14:15) JND it says: “And the female ostrich, and the male ostrich.” Now the reason I call attention to this is that we’re going to look at motherhood in a negative way. We can learn by the negatives.
In Job 39 we get this bird mentioned again. Remember, she takes the place before the male, her husband. And here’s the kind of mother she turns out to be. “The wing of the ostrich beats joyously—but is it the stork’s pinion and plumage?” (Job 39:1313Gavest thou the goodly wings unto the peacocks? or wings and feathers unto the ostrich? (Job 39:13) JND). What does that mean? I believe that the Lord is bringing before us here that the ostrich doesn’t have the plumage of a stork. Oh, she beats her wings joyously, but she doesn’t have a meek and quiet spirit. She makes a lot of ruckus.
You know, a little baby is born into the world and the mother may think she has gotten a wonderful little doll. God didn’t give you a wonderful little doll; He gave you a human to form for the kingdom of God. If you read about the Nazarites, you’ll see it was the mother who was addressed in the formation and raising of the Nazarite. “Of all that I said unto the woman let her beware” (Judges 13:1313And the angel of the Lord said unto Manoah, Of all that I said unto the woman let her beware. (Judges 13:13)). Then it tells what the woman is to do in the raising of her Nazarite.
Now the ostrich in Job 39 made a lot of noise, but she didn’t have the plumage of the stork, and it says that she “leaveth her eggs to the earth, and warmeth them in the dust... as though they were not hers: her labor is in vain, without her concern” (Job 39:14-1614Which leaveth her eggs in the earth, and warmeth them in dust, 15And forgetteth that the foot may crush them, or that the wild beast may break them. 16She is hardened against her young ones, as though they were not hers: her labor is in vain without fear; (Job 39:14‑16) JND). What does this picture to us? It’s a mother who does not take seriously the life-and-death issue of raising her children for the Lord.
Hannah says, “I have asked him of the Lord” (1 Sam. 1:2020Wherefore it came to pass, when the time was come about after Hannah had conceived, that she bare a son, and called his name Samuel, saying, Because I have asked him of the Lord. (1 Samuel 1:20)). The Lord gave her a child, and you say, “Hannah’s quit coming to meeting. Her husband is going up to Shiloh and she isn’t going along; she’s forgotten the Lord.” No, she didn’t forget the Lord. She knew she had a grave and serious service to do for the Lord. If this boy was going to serve in the house of God, he was going to have to have her undivided attention. Mothers, do you look at your families in that way? Do you see that God has given you a responsibility, a service for Him, that is unsurpassed? It’s going to require your care.
There is another reference to this bird, and it’s found in the book of Lamentations. It is why I have liberty to use her as an illustration of how not to be a mother. Lamentations 4:3-43Even the sea monsters draw out the breast, they give suck to their young ones: the daughter of my people is become cruel, like the ostriches in the wilderness. 4The tongue of the sucking child cleaveth to the roof of his mouth for thirst: the young children ask bread, and no man breaketh it unto them. (Lamentations 4:3‑4) states: “Even the sea monsters draw out the breast”—that is, they nurture and nourish their young; they care for their young “they give suck to their young ones: the daughter of my people is become cruel, like the ostriches in the wilderness. The tongue of the sucking child cleaveth to the roof of his mouth for thirst: the young children ask bread, and no man breaketh it unto them.” These daughters of God’s people followed the pattern of the mother ostrich; they became like her. They did not nourish and care for their young.
You might think, “I’d never be like that, and I don’t know any moms like that.” I’m afraid that we read these passages and think, “Yes, that’s that mother we heard about the other day who left her baby wrapped in something on a cold winter day and abandoned it. That’s the ostrich.” No it’s not. The ostrich is the mother who doesn’t weigh soberly and seriously the grave responsibility of raising her children and giving herself to them. In Leviticus there’s an ordinance that a little animal was to be under its dam seven days, and then on the eighth day it could be sacrificed to the Lord, and, on another day not the same day the mother could be sacrificed also (Lev. 22:27-2827When a bullock, or a sheep, or a goat, is brought forth, then it shall be seven days under the dam; and from the eighth day and thenceforth it shall be accepted for an offering made by fire unto the Lord. 28And whether it be cow or ewe, ye shall not kill it and her young both in one day. (Leviticus 22:27‑28)).
What does that teach the mothers? It teaches that God has given you a responsibility to raise your children, to nourish them, to care for them, to gather them, as a hen does her chicks, under your wing. Don’t allow the beasts to come in; they come in subtly. The enemy doesn’t come in so you recognize him, but he gets the mother away from the child and gets her occupied with what we might call the work of the Lord. You know, you’ve got the work of the Lord in your family, and I believe, whether we be fathers, husbands, wives or mothers, by far the most of what we have of Christ will be needed to be used on our own families (Ex. 12:44And if the household be too little for the lamb, let him and his neighbor next unto his house take it according to the number of the souls; every man according to his eating shall make your count for the lamb. (Exodus 12:4)). It may expose you to ridicule. They may have said about Hannah: “All she’s interested in is that little boy. She won’t even go to Shiloh to serve the Lord.” But Hannah recognized her work and that it was given to her of God. I am not suggesting your children should not be brought to the assembly meetings. It is vital that you do so. But do not get involved in “service for the Lord” that causes you to neglect your children.
In Israel, when a man’s field was harvested, he was to leave the corners and maybe some handfuls of purpose, but most of that field had to go to his house. The rest was for strangers and the poor. We can overextend ourselves in the name of service for the Lord I’m not speaking only to mothers now and sacrifice our children. That is not the Lord’s mind for parents.
H. Short