"Maybe I'm Not Trusting Right."

Listen from:
“I AM glad you have come today; Alice was wishing so much to see you;” and as the mother spoke, she placed a chair for me close by the bedside of the sick girl I had come to see.
A glance at the invalid told me that she was sinking fast. It was only a few days since I had been there before, but the disease (consumption) from which she was suffering had made rapid progress since then, and it was evident that in a few hours at most her earthly course would be run.
“And why were you wishing so much to see me today, Alice?” I asked, as I took the offered seat, and bent down my ear to catch the answer she was almost too weak to give.
“I’m afraid maybe I’m not trusting right.”
“But who is it you are trusting, Alice dear?” I asked.
“Jesus,” she whispered feebly.
“Well, He does not tell you to trust Him right, but only to trust Him, and none perish that trust Him. To trust is just to leave all to Him and nothing to yourself. Don’t you remember, Alice, last day I was in, we spoke together of the preciousness of the blood which cleanseth from all sin, and how you rested upon that?”
“Yes, but―but the evil thoughts come yet,” she replied faintly.
“Well, Satan can and does trouble us, causing us to doubt and fear when he gets us to look into ourselves, instead of just looking straight off to Jesus, and keep looking. But, Alice, there is one thing Satan knows well he cannot do, and that is, he cannot take a single one of those who have really trusted in the Lord Jesus out of His hand; even the feeblest is just as safe as the strongest when they are in His hand, for He has said none is able to ‘pluck them out of my hand’ (John 10:2828And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. (John 10:28)). Surely that is quite enough, Alice?”
A look of rest came into the young sufferer’s face, and she lay quite still for a little while, and then the shadow came back again.
“What troubles you now, dear?” I asked gently. “When I pray to Him,” she whispered, “I cannot get just the richt words I would like.”
“But the Lord Jesus does not tell you to pray with ‘richt’ words, Alice. Indeed He prays for you. Listen to what is here written in His Word. ‘Wherefore he is able also to save them to the uttermost that come unto God by him, seeing he ever liveth to make intercession for them’ (Heb. 7:2525Wherefore he is able also to save them to the uttermost that come unto God by him, seeing he ever liveth to make intercession for them. (Hebrews 7:25)). You know already what He has done for you when on the cross—taken your place, and borne your punishment; but think what He is doing for you now in the glory. ‘He ever liveth to make intercession for you.’ What else do you need?”
Rest and peace and joy were now plainly written on the dying one’s countenance. The entrance of God’s Word had given light. Satan had done his utmost to make her occupied with herself, her trust, her thoughts, her prayers, but she saw now that nothing depended upon her, but that Christ was all and in all. We thanked Him together for His matchless love and grace; and as she was now becoming much exhausted, I rose to go.
“Will you come back the morn again?” she asked.
“Yes, Alice, but it may be that before then you will be with the Lord.” She smiled brightly, for the thought gave her joy. And I then asked, “How long are you going to be with Him, Alice?”
“Forever and ever,” she murmured softly.
These were the last words I heard her utter, for in the morn when I called it was only to see the frail tabernacle of clay. Alice was absent from the body, present with the Lord. Yes, gone to be forever with Him who had redeemed her to God by His blood.
Perhaps this simple story meets the eye of some doubting one, who, like Alice, is troubled as to whether they have the right kind of trust.
But why think of yourself at all? Look away from yourself and all that you are, unto Him who suffered and bled and died for you here, and now lives for you in the glory above.
You will never find comfort or rest of heart in looking into yourself, or in looking around upon others. But, oh, what rest and peace and joy you will find in looking unto Jesus! And as you keep doing so, you will be enabled to live for Him and to Him. Once you were lost from Him, now you are to be lost in Him; that is, letting yourself sink out of sight in His abundant fullness, finding Christ all in all.
“You’ve trusted your soul to Christ, haven’t you?” asked one of an aged saint of God, who lay at the point of death. “Yes,” he gasped, in a hoarse whisper, “and had I a thousand souls I’d trust them all to Him.” Surely, for He is not only able to save, but also able to keep. Then doubt no more, dear reader, but trust Him only, trust Him fully, and be enabled to run with patience the race set before you, ―looking unto Jesus.
“Jesus, the One who knew no sin,
Made sin to make us just;
Thou gav’st Thyself our love to win,
Our full confiding trust.”
Y. Z.