A BELIEVER in the Lord Jesus Christ, engaged in a hospital, was sent to nurse a lady who had come from New York on a visit with her family and was now found to be dying of cancer. The nurse felt at the time very much depressed under the idea that she was leaving what seemed to her a larger sphere of usefulness merely to attend upon one lady.
However, she got to the house, and was shown into the room where her patient lay, who seemed a very kind and gentle person. Sitting up that night she spoke to her of Jesus, but the patient appeared to take no notice; nevertheless she persevered with prayer to God to open her eyes, that she might see her danger and her need of Christ. For a time that prayer seemed unanswered, for on the following day, instead of giving any heed to her kind nurse's remarks, she appeared to be entirely occupied with worldly affairs. En the evening her husband happened to remark to the nurse, as he sat by his wife's bedside, "My wife is so glad to have you, she is quite delighted to think both of you will be able to go away together in a month." Thinking that the patient was asleep, the nurse replied, "Ah, poor thing, I'm afraid she will never go back to New York"; but the husband, perceiving that his wife was awake, put his hand up to hinder her from saying any more.
That night she was very restless, for she had overheard the remark and if troubled her, although she said nothing on the subject. Nurse, who took the opportunity of a sleepless night to speak again to her of Jesus and His blessed work, made some observation which called forth from her patient the remark, "I am good, am I not?" to which she replied, "You know you are a sinner, don't you?”
“I am not," said the dying woman, “I am good.
I am very patient, I never murmur, I do not indeed love Jesus, but I never saw Him, and how can I love Him? He has not been kind to me; I love only my husband and those who are kind to me.”
Poor creature! Her husband, it seems, was an infidel, and had instilled his wicked notions into her mind, so that she pretended that, because she had never seen Jesus, she could not love Him, and would not believe that “the kindness and love of God our Savior toward man " had "appeared” in that " Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners.”
Again on the following day the nurse, anxious for her salvation, spoke to her frequently about Christ, but she still persisted in saying, “I am good." About five o'clock on the Sunday morning she said, "Nurse, am I not good?" She replied, “You are very patient and bear pain very well, but still that does not alter your condition as a sinner before God." To her nurse's glad surprise, she asked her to pray for her, which she did most earnestly, beseeching the Lord to reveal Himself to her dark soul, and show her the light of His divine love. After this she fell asleep, and on awaking said, “Come now, tell me honestly why you said last night I should never go away to New York.” Nurse was startled at her asking the question, and hesitated a little before replying, but she pressed for an answer, saying, " Come, be quick, tell me, I want to know, for I've got a lot to do before I die!”
Feeling that she was really dying, although no one told her so, but rather gave her to understand she would be well in a month and able to go back to her own home, nurse dared not trifle with her, but honestly said, " I am afraid you never will get better.”
Turning to her husband, she asked him if he thought she was dying. He answered decidedly, “No," and sought to hinder the nurse from saying anything further.
How terribly cruel is this practice so commonly pursued with dying persons, even by those who are not infidels! Rather than disturb the patient, they would let the dying sink into eternity wholly unconscious that so solemn a change is at hand! “The rich man died, and was buried; and in hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments." What a sudden and awful change!
Well, before the middle of the day, which was Sunday, she was taken so much worse that concealment of the truth was no longer possible, and as they all stood by her bedside she turned and said, " Nurse, if you are a Christian, pray for God to have mercy on me." This she did fervently, and then, feeling a little better for the moment, the dying woman said to those around her, " You ought all to go down on your knees and thank God I am spared a little longer.”
What a change was this in one of whom it could have been said with truth but a few hours before, “God was not in all her thoughts." But a greater change was at hand, for the darkness was passing, and the true light about to shine into her heart.
Towards evening of the same day she turned suddenly to her nurse and said, "Will God forgive me? I am a sinner, SUCH a sinner! I always thought I was good, but now I know I am not.”
Thus the Lord had opened her eyes at last, and you may judge how gladly her nurse told her that it was sinners the Lord Jesus came to save, not those who said they were good. Long and earnestly did nurse speak with her about the Savior and His love to poor lost sinners, until at last she fell asleep. When she awoke she said, “I think it was the Lord sent you to me; may God bless you; I am now resting in His blood, in His love; His blood has washed me.”
When shortly afterward her son came into the room, she said to him, "Sonny, mamma is dying; she is going to heaven to be with the Lord Jesus; she is now at rest with God." Her son replied she was all right, for she was always good. But she said, "No, I thought so once, but now I know that I was nearly lost." She spoke also to her husband about Christ, begging of him to meet her in heaven, and to come to Jesus. All night on Sunday night she prayed and praised God, and was calm and happy. On the Monday morning she said, "What a happy night I've had, I do love Jesus now; He has done so much for me." Her mother, who was a believer, replied, "You will soon be with Jesus." Her last words were, "The blood, mother," and then she sank to rest, trusting in the blood of Jesus Christ, God's Son, that "cleanseth from every sin" (1 John 1:77But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin. (1 John 1:7)). Thus her end was peace, not by her own works, but by the blood of the cross.
But five short days have passed since nurse first came to her, a messenger from God to a dying sinner. Those who have fellowship with the “joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that repenteth " will be thankful that she was enabled by grace to be faithful from the very first moment of her arrival, and to persist to the happy end. It was grace that sent and sustained her, and it was grace that gave the sweet reward —a sinner saved eternally by the blood of Christ. "Unto Him that loveth us and washed us from our sins in his own blood... to him be glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen" (Rev. 1:5, 65And from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, and the first begotten of the dead, and the prince of the kings of the earth. Unto him that loved us, and washed us from our sins in his own blood, 6And hath made us kings and priests unto God and his Father; to him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen. (Revelation 1:5‑6)).