Faith Before Comprehending

 •  12 min. read  •  grade level: 7
 
My husband and I were staying in a most beautiful spot of God’s earth. Not being able to walk, my couch was wheeled out on the broad veranda which stretched before our rooms. From here we could overlook the vine-crested hills, the fruitful gardens, shady woods, and beneath, the mighty river.
We often said that our heavenly Father had secured for us these rooms; they were not those originally intended for us. By a mistake a suite of rooms were assigned to us which had already been ordered by another party, but which we vacated upon the urgent entreaty of the hotelkeeper.
Through this chance, as man would call it, we came in contact with a person who aroused our deepest interest. It was a person who was enwrapt by the deep night of unbelief, a prisoner of the great deceiver, but concerning whom our Saviour-God had thoughts of peace.
The veranda bordering close to ours belonged to a suite of rooms from which our own were separated by an evidently thin partition. At least, we were able to hear a melodious voice which was reading every night in French, Italian, and at times in the German language. But we were never able to understand what was read, although the voice could plainly be heard. Nevertheless, or perhaps because of these circumstances, our interest in the unknown reader increased from day to day, never getting a glimpse of her. We often spoke of her. Who might she be? Would we ever get acquainted with her? And, above all, did she perhaps know the Lord Jesus as her Saviour?
At last, after the course of some days, we had the opportunity of beholding the object of our interest for the first time. She was a beautiful young woman. Her face showed earnestness and thoughtfulness. At times her clear, dark eyes looked sad, while the expressions in her face were ever changing. We knew immediately, she, and no on else, must be the reader. More than ever we felt drawn toward her. Beside her stood a gentleman of military appearance, who seemed to be ever ready to gratify her every wish with much carefulness. From the hotel register we learned them to belong to an aristocratic Austrian family.
During the two following days we saw the lady at intervals on the veranda. After that I was obliged to stay in my rooms. Having somewhat recovered, I received a beautiful bouquet one day, accompanied by a note from the Baroness. In loving words she offered the services of her maid to me, in case I needed such service at any time, asking at the same time if a visit from her might be convenient to me. This hour tore down, figuratively speaking, the partition which separated our rooms. When I was somewhat restored, we met daily; while the baron and my husband made long tours through the beautiful country.
I learned many a thing from the past of the fair lady. Although not 25 years of age, she had been married already seven years. Her husband was her idol, and she his. Because she was not strong in constitution, he had given up a much promising public life, so as not to be taken from her side. For the same reason he had left the land of his fathers, the climate not being agreeable to her frail health. They were constantly journeying, staying here and there for months or weeks, according to what influence the locality had upon her state of health. In course of time she related that soon after their arrival she had not been well, which explained the circumstance of seeing her only so long after our arrival. But she had watched us constantly and carefully, she assured me, having also become desirous to get acquainted with us, because we seemed so happy. The more I conversed with the lady, the clearer it became to me, the Lord’s hand was in all these circumstances; He had ordered everything. This was, as the baroness mentioned, the first time she had ever sought any intercourse among hotel guests.
To my deep sorrow I had soon to perceive that the Baroness, in spite of all her many amiable ways and character traits, was yet without Christ. She acknowledged without reserve that in her heart there was a void, an unsatisfied longing, which she was not able to explain. Her case showed to me decidedly that neither riches nor standing, nor youth, beauty or brilliancy of mind, nor even the most unselfish human love, can fill and satisfy the heart of man. There is ever that great void. Only God, and that so as He has revealed Himself in Christ, can still the deep longing of the heart; this every unconverted soul feels at times, and which, no doubt, the unsaved reader of this narrative has felt. Human devices, and means to still these desires and fill the void, there are none effective.
We told our new friend the secret of our happiness; told them of Jesus as the one who has met all the holy claims of God for us, in that He died in our stead. We sought to make clear to her that Jesus took all that was in our way upon Himself, and that this secured our eternity. Finally we testified to them that He was the precious object of our heart, whose love makes bright days still brighter and dark days pleasant and light.
Our words were received with much eagerness. Such a friend as Jesus was she would have also; a pattern like Him she would follow. But—and here was the great objection—to acknowledge and receive Him as the Son of God, as God Himself, she could not. Neither could she see the necessity of the work of atonement, and therefore she would not acknowledge the Word of God having full authority. Loved by all, honored and respected, she was not able to believe she was in God’s eyes a lost sinner; but Jesus must be either what His blessed name signifies—Saviour—God—or nothing, yea a deceiver.
Although matters stood thus with her, yet her interest increased every day while following our explanations. She found more and more to attract her heart in what was said, only her reason hindered her in taking full hold of the truth. Her wish to know the truth increased from day to day, and she often wept when we spoke of these things, being almost persuaded; almost she accepted God’s salvation; almost, but not wholly.
When we some time after took our departure, she bid us farewell with many tears. We promised to write her and exchanged our addresses.
The baron did not share the doubts and difficulties of his wife, but neither shared her deep interest. He acknowledged all to be true, but it was not for him; according to his idea, religion was for the priests and women.
Upon our arrival at R. we sent a few booklets which we thought might be helpful to her, but never received an answer. Often we spoke of her, and still oftener spoke about her to the Lord. Alas! she seemed to have been so near salvation’s door and yet unsaved.
Many years had passed. In all this time we had never heard of our acquaintances from A. Again it was summer and we were making preparations to leave the country for a while. Then—who can picture our surprise—my husband meets one day the baron on the street. Chance! man will say. But it was no mere chance. There is no chance with those who know God. The incidents which led to this meeting were of such extraordinary nature that we could again see distinctly the Lord’s hand.
“How will my wife rejoice when she hears I have met you,” were the first words of the baron. “She has so often longed for you. Through an accident we have lost your card, and we were unable to secure your address again.”
My husband thereupon offered our visit for the afternoon of the same day, which was accepted with thanks.
The baron had not said too much.
“O, how glad I am to see you again!” With these words she received us. “I have not forgotten a word of those things you spoke to me, and have prayed that if all that is true and is for me, God might lead it so that I would meet you once more. I knew the chances for such a meeting were very meager, for we had lost your address and how could we find you in this large city? Nevertheless I prayed and prayed, especially since we are here. We are to leave here within three days. I had almost given up all hope. Then came my husband this morning and brought me news from you. I was hardly able to believe it. Seems as though God were thinking of me.”
We had then a long conversation together. Before leaving, the baroness told me that she had written again and again, but had never sent the letter off. Being unable to say that she was believing, she had, in order not to make us feel sad, kept back the letters. Satan had succeeded until now through the pleasures of the world to hinder the growth of the seed sown, but it had remained in the heart nevertheless, although no fruit had sprung up as yet. At the time of leaving both promised to return the visit on the following day.
It needs no mentioning that we prayed much to the Lord in these hours for our friends, now found again. As far as the baroness was concerned, we received a sooner answer than we had anticipated. She saw that either has God left us without any revelation, or the Bible is this revelation; and, further, that if we accept the Scriptures as the Word of God, it must be received as a whole and not in part. Then we conversed about the person of Christ. From every point we viewed the testimony which God has given concerning Him; and, behold, now, at last, faith entered her heart, where reason had reigned before. Peace and rest were the result, as ever it is.
The following lines, which shortly after she sent to me, tell best the change wrought:
“I had prayed God to let me understand the truth concerning Jesus; God has answered me through the words of your husband last week. I cannot thank you enough for the patience you had with me. Have thought much about the fact, why it is so hard to believe; but now I perceive that the greatest difficulty in the way was my want of lowliness. As long as I sought to fathom Him and His Word in my own foolish pride, I understood nothing; but when I came simply to Him, leaving my own thoughts behind, asking Him humbly to give me His thoughts, then He made all fully clear. I feel so unworthy. And yet, when I think of the death of Christ and of all that He has suffered for me, when I think that it was only my sins which were the cause I have not found Him sooner—O, then my whole heart beats for Him, and then I wish all my friends might find and know Him.”
More and more it became evident that the love of God which had been shed abroad in the heart of our friend, had made of her a new creation. Her modesty and humility were most touching. In another letter she wrote concerning a near relative:
“Do you believe I might dare to tell her what the Lord has done for me? I am so fearful I might be a hindrance and might not be able to explain the truth clearly enough. Am sending her all your letters.”
In answer I wrote:
“Go home to thy friends, and tell them how great things the Lord hath done for thee.”
In return I received the following lines:
“I have written to —, begging her to turn to the Lord, that He might lead her into the truth. He would surely answer her as He answered me. Before, I thought one must understand before believing, but I have found that faith comes first. After that we begin to comprehend. I see now how foolish it was of me, to think we sinful, weak and mortal beings were able from our own selves to understand the eternal and holy God. My prayer to Him is now that He might keep me in His way, teaching me more of Himself, and, above all, that He may draw my husband to Himself.”
Two of her relatives were converted. But her deepest wish has as yet been unanswered. Although her husband would never lay anything in the way of his wife, but the contrary—she was ever the center of his thoughts, and rejoiced at her new-found joy. Deeper feelings than these never awoke in his heart. But his wife does not grow weary in crying to the Lord to have mercy on him, that he might share her deep joy.
And how it is with you, dear reader? Do you already possess and enjoy the peace that passeth all knowledge? If not, do not any longer consult your reason, the thoughts of your own heart. Do not allow Satan to deceive you, nor be led away by your natural desires, but give yourself up to the Lord Jesus for His own possession. Believe in Him. Faith comes before comprehending.
“Be it known unto you, therefore, men and brethren, that through this Man is preached unto you the forgiveness of sins; and by Him all that believe are justified from all things, from which ye could not be justified by the law of Moses.” (Acts 13:39-4039And by him all that believe are justified from all things, from which ye could not be justified by the law of Moses. 40Beware therefore, lest that come upon you, which is spoken of in the prophets; (Acts 13:39‑40)).