In the month of September, 1874, C. E. J. wished his fellow-workmen Good night in his usual health. He had not proceeded very far, when he was suddenly seized with profuse hemorrhage of the lungs. As soon as he recovered a little he returned to the shop, and found some of the men still there. After telling what had happened, one of them kindly went home with him, a short distance by rail. He was not able to return to his work for several weeks. He rallied after a time, and went back to his accustomed employment as a cabinet maker, but the very severe cold of November again laid him aside from work, never to return.
The doctor gave very little hope of his recovery, and his soul was not saved. When a boy, he had attended a Sunday school; but unhappily, in after life, he imbibed infidel notions. He read his Bible and the Prayer Book, but it was not to learn about Jesus, the value of His blood, and the greatness of His salvation.
His christian friends were very unhappy about him, knowing he was not saved; and like most skeptics he was irritable and unapproachable in matters about his soul. His relatives saw, with increasing anxiety, he was getting weaker day by day, and without God and without hope in the world. At length, a christian relative broke through restraint and in few words told him very plainly and solemnly the state he was in by nature as an unsaved sinner, and pointed him to Jesus as the only way. He had not a word to say, but skewed great feeling and wept bitterly.
Shortly after another nearer relative spoke to him of his state by nature, and of the joy there was in being safe in Jesus Christ, and then put the plain question to him, “Are you fit to die?” He again evinced great emotion, and only answered by a flood of tears. He confessed afterward that the question made him dumb. He had not a word to say, but could not lose the thought, “Are you fit to die?” He could not get relief; he tried to pray, but could not; he tried to repeat the Lord’s prayer, but could not remember it; he was truly miserable. The question remained with him. No doubt God had fixed it there for blessing.
Just about this time he was much worse; hemorrhage of the lungs returned, and it was thought he could not live much longer. But God, who is rich in mercy, spared him a few weeks longer. He did not tell any one the state of his mind. Special prayer was asked for him at a Saturday evening prayer-meeting. He began to break down, and said his friends might say what they liked to him; it was quite right what they said. He read tracts and books sent to him. A volume of God’s Glad Tidings for 1874 was greatly blessed to his soul; and after the second Saturday evening of special prayer for him, he found peace through believing in Jesus. He said very little more than that he was saved and happy, and willing to die when it pleased God to take him; but that the anguish of soul he had passed through from the assaults of the enemy could never be described. He was very confident about his salvation, although for some time he said but little. A relative, speaking to him, said, “Now C., we believe you to be Safe in the arms of Jesus;” to which he exclaimed, “Believe! I am sure—I am positive—I am saved!”
His sufferings were very great, but he never was heard to murmur. He was overwhelmed at times at the grace of God to pardon such a sinner as he had been, and he longed very much to be with Jesus in the Lord’s own time.
Once after a severe attack of pain, his wife said to him, “You will not be much longer here.” He replied, “No; I don’t wish to be any longer here; but not my will, but His be done.” At another time he was passing through great suffering, and said, “O Lord, take me home out of this state.” And with the same breath regretted that such a murmur should have escaped his lips, saying, “What is this to what my Savior suffered for me? or, what is it compared with the joy I shall have in the presence of Jesus?” At another time, seeing his wife weeping because he was suffering, he begged her not to grieve, saying, it will be all rest very soon.”
Being asked by a relative if he had any fear of death, he said, “No,—not any; how can a sinner that has been forgiven so much be afraid to die?”
He was a great favorite with his fellow-shopmen. All came to visit him during his illness he spoke very freely to them of their state as sinners, and of Jesus the only Savior; and begged them to think of their souls, and not to put off salvation as he had done.
He spoke of death with the greatest composure. He arranged everything for the funeral, that his wife might not have any confusion in this matter after he was gone home. All was peace; death had lost its sting, and the grave its victory, through the blood of the Lamb.
Just a week before he died the hemorrhage of the lungs returned, and he thought he was going home, and taking leave of a young relative, retaining the grasp of his hand, and with a look of dying anxiety, entreated him not to rest until he knew his soul was safe in Jesus. Speaking of his own life as wasted, he said, “You may possibly not have the time given you at last that I have had.”
His next trial was to take leave of his little girl, an interesting little child, four years of age. He told her to think of Jesus and look to Him, and then she would see him in heaven and be with Jesus there; and that she must be a good girl to her mother. He was much overpowered at parting with her. He entreated his wife to look to the Lord, to have faith in Him, and He would provide for her: for He promised to be a father to the fatherless and a husband to the widow. He gave her the book which the Lord used for blessing to his own soul, wishing her to take great care of it, and to it friend that he knew was greatly interested in his conversion, he constantly sent messages of gratitude and assurances of his safety and joy in the Lord, and said prayer for him had not been in vain.
He repeated passages of scripture and hymns that he had learned at the Sunday school when a boy. He felt very deeply the fact of the Lord’s goodness in saving him, such a sinner as he had been. Although a strictly moral man, a good, kind husband, and an affectionate father, he never boasted of any goodness of his own, bat acknowledged all to be through the grace of God. He suffered very severe pain, but with the greatest possible patience, saying it was but a little time, and he looked to the joy he should shortly have in the presence of Jesus.
The end was very near, the Lord called him home on Lord’s day, February 11Th. His relatives were standing round his bed. He said, “I am going now;” and to each one he gave a farewell look, and said, “Goodbye. I have done with earth. I am going a long journey, but I am not afraid; the valley is not dark, and I can see a bright lamp, and Christ is my light and my salvation.” He calmly fell asleep in Jesus, on Lord’s day, at the age of 28, leaving a widow and two children.
M. B. H