In the latter part of Proverbs 31, the Spirit of God describes for us the virtuous woman, whose price is “far above rubies” (vs. 10). Throughout the history of the human race, men have characteristically been impressed with physical beauty in women, but the emphasis here is on her character, and especially her fear of the Lord. When we consider the departure from God’s order in today’s world concerning the relative place of men and women, there are a number of points to be noticed in this description.
Her God-Given Talents
First of all, this woman was both clever and active. Doubtless she acknowledged her husband’s headship and submitted to him, but this did not keep her from using her God-given talents to the full. She exemplified the truth of 1 Timothy 5:14 (JND): “I will therefore that the younger [women] marry, bear children, rule the house, give no occasion to the adversary in respect of reproach.” In the administration of a busy household, she found ample scope for the use of her mind. She was involved in directing the working of the household, in selling articles made in her house, and even in the buying of property. She directed the affairs of the household so well that her husband did not need to concern himself about them, for he could trust in her.
Her Home
Second, all her activities were centered in the home. While she was most diligent, even to the point of buying and selling, she did not go out and seek to work in the public eye. Her husband takes on that role, for he was “known in the gates” and sat “among the elders of the land” (Prov. 31:2323Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. (Proverbs 31:23)). While she used her abilities well, she used them in the sphere that was given to her of God.
Her Work
Third, she was not afraid to get into the work herself. It is true that she directed and arranged for the work of others, but it is recorded that she worked “willingly with her hands” (Prov. 31:1313She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. (Proverbs 31:13)), that she rose also “while it is yet night” (vs. 15), that she “girdeth her loins with strength,” and that “her candle goeth not out by night” (vs. 18). She not only directed her household, but led by example.
Her Children
Finally, she brought up her children in a way that caused them to “arise up, and call her blessed” (vs. 28). She was characterized by “strength and honor” (vs. 25), yet “she openeth her mouth with wisdom,” and “in her tongue is the law of kindness” (vs. 26).
I believe we see in this account God’s wisdom brought before us. Today the care of a household and the bringing up of children is sometimes despised, as if it were work better left to those who could not “make it” in the outside world. Here we see how God has fitted the woman to “rule” the house and to use her gifts in directing the home in the right way. The combination of the virtues of strength, honor, wisdoms and kindness uniquely fitted this woman for her role, and I believe God is showing us that these things can characterize any woman of God. For this reason it is hard to overemphasize the importance of a wife and mother in the home, and particularly in her character as a mother. When children are young and impressionable, it is their mother who is best fitted to mold their character and shape their will on a day-to-day basis. Doubtless the father too must share in this responsibility, but because he is absent from the home part of the time on account of his work, the children will be left more in the mother’s care. Her careful attention to “the nurture and admonition of the Lord” during their formative years is a most important responsibility, and one neglected only to the detriment of children.
Some Exceptions
In saying this, we recognize that circumstances in the modern world sometimes make this more difficult. When families live in areas where the cost of living is high, sometimes the wife feels that she too must get a job outside the home in order to make ends meet. Other adverse circumstances, such as the inability of the husband and father to go out to work, or even his not being present at all, can make it even more difficult for a mother to fulfill her role as Scripture intended. As has often been remarked, Scripture is not written as a legal book, to cover every possible detail in life, but rather it is a book of principles that must be applied in various circumstances in communion with the Lord and with the guidance of His Spirit. If our hearts are right before Him and there is a sincere wish to walk in the light of His Word, I believe we will find that He is able to make a way for us.
The wisdom of this world, especially in western countries, is more and more against this role for women, and man fails to see that the rising tide of evil, the increasing delinquency of children, and the disobedience and disorder in public schools can at least in part be traced back to the lack of a mother’s presence in the home. It is easy for Christian women to fall into this kind of thinking, as they are bombarded with it from every side. But we must remember, as a servant of the Lord used to remind us, that we are never wiser than Scripture. The wisdom of God as revealed in His Word not only honors God, but ultimately brings happiness to man too.
W. J. Prost