A Soldier's Confession.

 
YOUNG convert thus writes: ― “I have felt many times I would like the Lord’s dear people to know the way and the means He used in bringing me to Himself, to know Him as my own dear Saviour. I joined the army on the 1St December 1887, and lived a careless and indifferent life, caring for only the things of this world. Regardless of my immortal soul, I continued this course of life until the month of June 1890, though several months before then the Holy Spirit was striving with me. Sometimes I would be on my knees before the Lord, and another day as careless as ever. Often those words have come to me, ‘My spirit shall not always strive with man.’ I knew it was the Spirit of God that was striving with me, and I used to dread the thought of the Spirit of God leaving me to myself; but, blessed be the Lord, it was the Shepherd seeking the lost sheep. He sought me, and He found me.”
It was one Lord’s day the latter end of June 1890 that the Lord spoke to me again, while I was at the regimental church. It was nothing that was going on in the services, but a verse of a hymn that I had often heard my dear mother sing, and had sung it myself when a boy. The words were these:
‘One there is above all others,
Oh! how He loves.’
I shall never forget that moment, so real was it, as if the Lord had spoken to me from the glory. They were not singing this hymn, and it was not then that I found peace, although I got it the same day.
“I was stationed at the time in the Isle of Wight, at Sandown, and myself and two other men were put in charge of a small battery or fort; and this day, after we had returned from church, and had our dinner, one of the men went to the gate, and the Lord had sent someone with a message for my soul, for someone had put a book through the door of entrance into the fort. My comrade going to the door saw it, picked it up, just looked at it, and then gave it to me. This book was ‘THE GOSPEL MESSENGER.’ The Lord had sent someone with it, as a message to my soul! The piece which was used of the Lord for my conversion was, ‘How a sinner can get saved,’ Vol. 5., No. 6 of 1890. It was shown that ‘as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of man be lifted up: that whosoever believeth on him should not perish, but have everlasting life.’ Those words in John 3:14-1614And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of man be lifted up: 15That whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have eternal life. 16For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. (John 3:14‑16) brought peace to my soul, as the writer was showing so plainly about the Israelites, how they only had to look to the brazen serpent; and I could see it so plainly, that I was to look to Christ by faith, and live, and I knew I was born again.
“Before that I had not realized what sin was in God’s sight, nor yet what a sinner I had been. Then all the sins of my past life seemed to rise up before me, as they had never done before, and I seemed in more darkness than ever. Satan was using all his power, and telling me that I had only been deceiving myself, and that it was impossible for the Lord to forgive me, for I had been too bad. Not knowing what to do, I was almost despairing about what I had been. The Lord then spoke to me in a still small voice by His Word, ‘The blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin;’ and I said, ‘Yes, Lord, it does,’ and a sweeter peace filled my soul than had ever done before. And since then I have not doubted my conversion. All praise be to the Lord, who works in mysterious ways. When I think of all His love to me, I can but praise Him. All His dealings with me have been wonderful this last, year again. He has led me in to fuller light, giving me to know Christ as the object of my heart, and gathering me out to His precious name.
“I feel, dear brother, in writing these few lines, showing you the Lord’s dealings with one so unworthy, that you would be able to praise Him, and thank Him, that your work of faith and labor of love is not in vain in the Lord. To Him be all the praise and glory, for He is worthy. I would love to know the dear one who put the book through the gate. I have the book still, and it is very precious to me. ―I remain, your affectionate brother in Christ,
A. M.”